“Short Circuit” gets remade, because there are no new ideas.

No disassemble, Stephanie!

I remained cool when MTV co-opted “Teen Wolf” and turned it into a post “Twilight” paranormal romance series.  I barely raised an eyebrow when Will Smith’s rather charmless offspring was jammed into a “Karate Kid” reboot so dull that I forgot it even as I was watching it.

But my normally placid nature will tolerate no more – for proof that Los Angeles is full of dullards who couldn’t find a new idea if it were dangled in front of them via a carrot-and-stick scenario, the Hollywood brains trust is remaking “Short Circuit”.

We’re dealing here with a great 80’s movie, and one which has great nostalgic name recognition for parents, a cute robot character to sell toys to children with and the possibility of some tween pop star doing the El Debarge theme song anew (warning – YouTube video contains more 80’s awesome than you can handle…).

Ally and Johnny 5 - a match made in the 80's...

I can understand why a studio would look at a project like this and think – “$$$!” – but I’m not sure that this is a premise which would translate brilliantly for today’s audience.   Kids today seem to sniff out contrivance and schtick with laser-like focus, so I’m wondering whether they would buy into the idea of lightning transforming a military weapon into a sentient hippy whimsy droid for a single second?

And who’s going to play Stephanie?  I’m trying to think of an actress who has the sigh-inducing sweetness of Ally Sheedy and I’m coming up more or less empty.   And which naive young fool would think that he has the dizzying comic chops to be able to step into the sizeable shoes of Steve Guttenberg?

Oh, the wrong-headedness of this plan – especially as the bloke who did THIS is supposed to making it

 

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