Tag Archives: Jeremy Renner

“Hansel & Gretel” – now with added red stuff…

Apparently Jeremy Renner is in this movie. Didn’t notice.

Put “Hansel and Gretel – Witch Hunters” in my eyes now, Hollywood!  Now, damn your eyes!

Ahem.

What I meant to say was that there’s a new Red Band trailer for Tommy Wirkola‘s first American movie and its a tad on the intense side. Yes, there will be blood, but as it’s Halloween, you’re probably not going to be afraid of mucho witch decapitation, folks exploding into gory chunks and up-close head-shots.

Subtlety is not on this film’s agenda, clearly, and I’m a lot more assured by the tone of this trailer than I was by the initial, general audiences effort which went online a month or so back and induced much in the way of ‘Meh’ from the internet cognoscenti – this looks like a film from the director of “Dead Snow“, as opposed to the slightly ‘Van Helsing‘-ish initial first look.

Still, it’s a long wait for me – this film will be merrily decapitating Witches from January 25th 2013 in the US and won’t make the broom-hop across the pond for another two months, by which time I’ll probably be seeing the first pre-order news for the Region A Blu-Ray disc and dropping my cash on that instead.

And there I was thinking that film distributors had gotten wise to the idea that artificially staggered release dates harm the box office prospects of their products…

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Rachel Weisz is Metal.

Readers of this blog with sufficiently intact and functioning memories (or the inclination to search a while) will be doubtless familiar with my unabashed admiration and slight crush on British actress (and new American citizen) Rachel Weisz.

Man, that new Dimmu Borgir is the Shizz!

An admiration now bolstered quite a bit by the astonishing revelation that she’s a metal fan.

Yes, quite.  Describing herself as ‘an old mosher’, this news makes me wonder precisely who her favourite bands would be – given that she’s roughly two years older than me, I have to imagine that she’s a fan of the Big Four era of thrash, perhaps?  Maybe down for some “Appetite”-era G’N’R?  Or is she, Saint Diamond Dave preserve us, partial to a bit of Van Halen, Bon Jovi and Poison-vintage 80’s hard rock?

The mind boggles and the head?  It bangs.  \M/

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“Avengers” premiere – early buzz leaking out…

Yep, not enough awesome in that pic.

So, there’s this small superhero flick opening in a few weeks – you may have read the odd post about it on this blog?

“The Avengers”  (or “Avengers Assemble“, if you live in a small and confused island in Northern Europe) had a glitzy premiere in Los Angeles last night and has prompted very positive early reactions from the jammy sods press types who were lucky enough to see it.

My personal highlight of the Tweet-fest,  from noted contrarian and geek critic Devin Faraci of BadAssDigest

“AVENGERS is good enough to make me forgive IRON MAN 2“.

Yoink!  Not that “Iron Man 2” was that bad – that Monte Carlo fight scene kicks all kinds of booty – but it’s probably the biggest misstep in Marvel movies to date.  Another movie in a young series which ends with an extended action sequence which plays like a rejected pitch for a Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Robots movie is not my idea of moving the franchise forward – I’m guessing that the team dynamic of the Avengers squad may have something to do with Faraci’s reaction.

Joss Whedon, nerd-father rising. Haters to the left, if you please...

Your actual, proper reviews are still embargoed but I don’t see that state of affairs continuing much longer if this early buzz is any indicator…

 

 

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Whatever happened to action movies?

Image

An interesting and thought-provoking piece today over at about the unbearable heft of the latter-day action movie – as you may reasonably fear, it set me thinking…

The premise of Simon Brew’s feature is that contemporary action movies fail because they have concerns which are impossible to relate to – who, amongst us, will ever be called upon to duke it out with our giant robot buddies and face off against meaner, bigger robots in a tumultuous struggle to save our very planet?

There can be no inherent suspense or drama in a premise like that because we can’t relate to it – we can only behold it, with mouths wide and brains in idle, as one would take in a theme park ride.  As an audience, we’re hostages to which ever kitchen sinks the film maker chooses to lob at us (in 3D!).

It wasn’t always this way.

A man of thought and action in nice Tweed - that's what's missing nowadays...

Harrison Ford used to own the summer movie-going season by playing broadly plausible, fallible and identifiable action heroes who were at least as gifted with thought as talented with fists.   Indiana Jones, Jack Ryan, Dr Richard Kimble – not an indestructible, CG-assisted, weightless sketch drawing of a character amongst them.  If you wanted a moderately grumpy voice of reason who could kick your ass and fix your roof, Ford was your man.

I love a superhero movie as much as the next nerd but I have to confess that the last couple of decades have robbed the honest-to-goodness action movie of a lot of its impact – why would you pay your cash to see an actor in their thirties foil conspiracy and bust crooked cops when you can have a quippy stud in a unitard fling cars and thunderbolts at your barely believing noggin (in IMAX!)?

This isn’t a thinly veiled pitch for a return to the glory days of Shane Black penned, acerbic crime thrillers (Hell, even the Black-meister’s now writing and directing the third Iron Man for Marvel, which actually seems like a good fit), as that era had more than it’s fair share of unwatchable crap.  But it would be nice to balance out the CG juggernauts with smaller scale action fare which has a more human-sized premise to induce mayhem and reduce metropolitan property values for our entertainment.

Perhaps our collective world view is now so jaded that a nineties action movie can’t seem like anything but a quaint remainder of when film directors really had to blow things up with practical explosions as opposed to giving Chip, the ILM work experience guy a plate and letting him go nuts with his PC.  I’d like to think not – but a glance at this summer’s putative blockbusters-in-waiting is short on old school action heroes and big on funny book follies.

You’ve got your Jeremy Renner rebooted “Bourne” spin-off, soon-come Superman Henry Cavill in “Bourne”-like The Cold Light of Day and the unapologetically retro sequel to old school icon Sly Stallone‘s “The Expendables” to look forward to if you prefer to have your asses kicked by veterans rather than n00bs, but the real-world action is thin on the ground this year.

I’ll be honest with you – I love my Sci-Fi, horror and fantasy, but I miss the 80’s and 90’s lunk heads, heroes from a time when all you really needed to make it big in Hollywood was a dubious mullet, noxious reactionary politics and a million-dollar grin.

"Go on, mention 'Tooth Fairy' one more time..."

My point, and I think I do have one, is this – why the hell isn’t Dwayne Johnson doing this kind of stuff and being the biggest movie star in the world?

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“Avengers” Assemble new trailer…

Is it the end of April yet?  No?  Oh well, I suppose that I’ll just have to make do with this new trailer for Joss Whedon‘s upcoming “Avengers” movie.

Hulk like trailer! Trailer full of Hulk Win! Hulk smash aliens good!

Of course, you’ll be noticing the odd title change that the film’s had in Europe – presumably so as not to convince the three people who went to see the ill-advised Ralph Fiennes/Uma Thurman “Avengers” movie back in 1998, the Marvel film is now “Avengers Assemble” in my neck of the global woods.

Well, at least they're not calling it "Super Happy Marvel Team Up Explosion", I suppose...

So, why not head over to our friends at The Mary Sue and get your face smacked up by the new hotness?  If you have Fan/Nerd/Geek Squee, prepare to unleash it.

Guys, what was that thing about Joss Whedon randomly killing us off for giggles?

Once you get past all of the urban combat stuff which looks neat but uncomfortably close to the mise-en-mayhem of Michael Benjamin Bay, there’s a bunch of new stuff in this trailer which had me air-punching and chuckling at the massive scale madness and the toys that Whedon has to play with.

Hawkeye, in the air, shooting arrows at suckers, like a boss...

There may well be a distinct lack of posting on April 26th, by way of an advanced heads-up – it appears that I’ll be too busy picking my jaw up off the floor to do much in the way of blogging…

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“Avengers” Superbowl trailer tease

Jeremy-Renner-Hawkeye-Bow-Close-up

Because I’m that much of a Joss Whedon fanboy and can’t wait to see “The Avengers” movie, here’s a blink and miss it tease of the trailer which will play during some sportsball-based event or other this weekend.

As I’m going to be on holiday on next week, I may not get the chance to see the full trailer for a while but this indicates that all of my superhero-related needs are going to be met in full.

Avengers Assembling? Check.  Lots of things being needlessly blown up whilst panicked office workers run away from them and try not to look into the camera?  Check.  A kooky, ‘dutched’ angle of ScarJo apparently included solely to reduce my compadre D-X into a pool of lovesick, watery whimsy, “Amelie”-style?  Check-a-mundo.

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02/01/2012 · 4:50 pm

New “Avengers” trailer, anyone?

First things first – it’s in German.  So, if you’ve ever entertained the notion of Scarlett Johansson having an even huskier, European accent – your Christmas has arrived early.

For everyone else, there are a few different sequences herein than seen in the earlier teaser trailer – the aforementioned ScarJo meeting Mark Ruffalo in pre-Hulk mode is new.

Scarlett. What else do you need to know?

There’s also a good sense of how sensitive, thoughtful, character-centric geek auteur Joss Whedon gets down when given the opportunity to blow things up:

Stitch that, Michael Bay!

There’s some seriously nice eye-candy for most viewers of this trailer, whether your taste runs to hot Nordic dudes swinging their hammers:

Imagine a Captain Hammer vs Thor battle. Oh, the possibilities....

Or bad-ass captains of industry out for a night flight:

This is, I believe, the Mark 3,987 Iron Man suit. Give or take.

It’s all kinds of sweet, even when you can’t understand a bally word those nice German voice over actors are saying.

I won’t lie – I’m super-hyped for this one.

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