It’s funny because it’s true. If proud son of Sheffield and international film and TV thesp Sean Bean appears in your work, there’s a good-to-great chance that he’s going to be bumped off in a fashion most unbecoming.
The three of you reading this who saw the passable Michael Bay flick “The Island” might well wince in recognition of Bean’s final fight with Ewan McGregor, which took a left path passed acceptable self-defense and right on into homicidal, malicious harm. As I recall, it was less about beating up on the bad guy and more about getting hooks through skin and chucking Bean’s villain off the side of a gantry way.
‘Clive Barker-esque’ is the description that I would give to his manner of despatch.
In any case, let’s all get behind a cause which is noble and close to the heart of folks like me – Sean Bean may play Sean Bean in every role that he’s cast in, his accent may never stray further than North Derbyshire (even when he’s in Middle-Earth) and he may support Sheffield United (we all have our problems to deal with), but he doesn’t deserve to be flung about like a crash-test dummy and killed indiscriminately after not many minutes of screen time.
Save Sean! Bean Rights now! Occupy Sean Bean! (or sentiments to that effect).