Tag Archives: Wacken

Wacken on the water?

Heavy Metal-themed cruises are not exactly a new idea – Barge To Hell, anyone?

But until now, they’ve involved a lot of travel to get to the embarking port – well-heeled (or childless) metal heads who fancy a cruise-based holiday with their better halves now have a European option for this kind of holiday and it’s coming from the people who bring you the legendary Wacken festival every summer.

Full Metal Cruise – all the fun of a festival, on the highest of seas?

You can expect the usual delights of one of these holidays – as much food as you can consume, excursions and shore-based activities, libations and regular gigs on board with 20 bands promised for the inaugural event.

To me, it sounds kind of like bliss but my delightful dog Hagrid’s needs come first, so I’ll be sitting this particular voyage of the damned out for now – a metallic cruise where the scenery changes regularly, the bands are fantastic and the viking vibes are ever-present?  If that’s not a holiday to remember, I don’t know what is.

 

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Mind-Boggling, Taste-Challenging Power Metal Album Artwork of the Day

Catchy title, huh?  I feel a series coming on – because, if you love Metal (and particularly the ‘Power Metalsub-genre), there’s no shortage of album artwork which can bemuse, confound and delight in equal measure.

I’m going to start this feature with German band Axxis and their 2004 release, Time Machine.

Image

Yes, quite.

Axxis like their fantasy/sci-fi artwork and this album art somehow manages to evoke their blend of overblown, fashion eschewing, old school power metal merely via the medium of judicious photoshop and much cheese consumption (literal and figurative).  I’m not sure that we require a leather-clad brunette to get the point, much less one who appears to be in the throes of what appears to be a very painful back spasm.  Further scrutiny of this in-no-way phallic imagery will almost certainly challenge this blog’s self-appointed PG rating, so there we must end things, lest unpleasantness set in.

Suffice is to say that Feminism has not yet made it to Axxis’ in-tray, much less their ‘things we perhaps should action promptly’ list.

That said, the music is pretty keen if you like your metal European, endlessly redolent of the Wacken festival and delivered by men with intriguing facial hair.  The stand-out track on this album for me is “The Demons Are Calling”, which fills my ‘20,000 miles an hour’ riff quotient quite nicely – whether your grin is derived of pity or geeky recognition, it’s almost certain that you’ll have a smile on your face when you listen to it.

Tomorrow – more things of an equally geeky stature, possibly with dragons and/or spaceships.  You know how we roll…

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